Archive for the 'Baby Stuff' Category

The latest…

June 16, 2011
  • Today I booked a commercial.  THANK GOD.
  • Web Series is 2/3 of the way shot.  Just one more weekend to go.
  • Today I met with a very good commercial agent my manager set me up to meet.  It turns out my sort of famous director (who is a hot young actor) is with them and we (the agent and I) started talking about him.  The meeting went very well and they totally dig me.  But then I freaked out and emailed my director and asked him NOT to tell them I was married with a kid.  I don’t think I’m paranoid.  I think this is how it is in the biz.  I even ran into one mother (who had her daughter with her) and when I told her I had a 2.5 year old she exclaimed:  “You look so young!”

The latest…

May 16, 2011

The Artist’s tools:  Post It Notes and a dry erase marker.

Baby M creating art...The Artist displays her works.

We pulled Baby M out of day care.

Among other things, Baby M was given junk food if she didn’t eat her lunch.  When Baby M was a tiny infant she was pretty much potty trained.  Now we need to retrain her to potty train.

My husband and I were not crazy about the daycare.  They meant well but they weren’t really able to care for all of the kids.  The caretakers “read” books by blasting a CD on a radio and turning pages on the books while talking on their phones.

The final straw was when I had a conversation with one of Baby M’s primary caretakers:

Me:  How have you been?

Caretaker:  Oh, I’m great!  I just went partying last night!  Had a great time!

My heart sank.  This caretaker thought she was my friend and she was confiding, in a sense, that she was cool and hip.  This daycare thing wasn’t really her gig.

Of course I had to go on auditions and have meetings but at what price?  To have a diabetic kid who isn’t potty trained till she’s 15???

I decided that when summer hit I would take Baby M out of daycare and have a mother’s helper for a few hours at my home.

It hasn’t been entirely easy.  My mommying skills are a bit rusty.  Baby M requires a LOT of attention and engagement.  I have to relearn where all the cool spots are for her during the day (story time, which playground’s sandbox is cool, dance class etc…)  I still don’t talk to a lot of moms and it’s easy to feel a bit isolated.

That said, I’m grateful for this opportunity where I can spend time with my daughter. My career, while not perfect, allows me down time where I can change my entire schedule.  (Actually it should be the same for all vocations.  Shouldn’t all parents get to spend more quality time with their children?  Not matter what their occupation is?)

Baby M and I have a special bond and she is very attached to me.  I feel she is a vibrant yet sensitive soul and hence my reason for wanting to stay with her.  As long as I can be with her and provide a warm, happy home (code for me not going batsh*t crazy), I’ll keep the arrangement.

That’s all parenthood is:  it’s arranging your life the best you can to serve your family the best you can.

Audition with a baby…

December 16, 2009

God bless my agent who snagged me an audition (as a COLLEGE STUDENT) for The Good Wife.  I got it the night before and I fretted big time because I don’t have a babysitter.  I feared I would have to skip it.  My agent gently told me to go because she didn’t want me to miss any legit auditions.

And so we went.

It was way downtown and I decided to drive down there.  And for some reason the drive was smooth and everything went really well.  Baby M happily munched on Cheerios while I signed in and looked over my lines.  I changed her once, I gave her something to eat.  I had no nerves because I was busy caring for her.

The audition itself was almost an afterthought.  It was really a fun process.  The actors around us were really kind and one woman actually watched Maddie before I went into the room.

This gave me a little boost I needed.  Lately I’ve been wondering what the heck I was doing with my life and if I should even bother being an actress.  I’ve decided this business, as crazy as it is, is the life for me.  It’s not for the weak.  It’s for those with an iron-clad stomach and skin thick as elephant toenails.  Neither is being a mother.  So…it makes sense these two things go hand in hand.

Excellent quote:

July 22, 2009

Jacqueline Kennedy Onassis:

If you bungle raising your children, I don’t think whatever else you do well matters very much.

Happy 9 Months Birthday!

July 3, 2009
Toothless wide eyed grinnery

Toothless wide eyed grinnery

Baby M:

You are nine months old today.  I spend a lot of time complaining about motherhood and you may read this and be like, “MOM, geez!”

While I am not cut out for motherhood (I’m not and will never be a Betty Homemaker) you are a joy in my life that exceeds the drudgery of being a mostly working at home mother.  I was not really expecting to ever really be a mother, much less be totally in love with my kid…but I do.  Yes it is hard work, but you are so worth it.

You are moving around a LOT.  You are curious about every oject that is in front of you.  You are starting to stand up if you have something to hold on to.  You love to throw your whole body weight while you’re on the bed so I don’t put you on the bed anymore.

You are quite feisty and outspoken.  You know exactly what you want and you go after it with gusto.  Whether it’s eliciting a smile from a stranger on the train or a bottle of sanitizer, you reach for it and usually get what you want.

Right now you love to read books and turning the pages.

You are very expressive and smile with your whole face.  That’s the same expression that I used to do when I was an infant.

You get REALLY sweaty and that worries  me (though your dad scolds me for worrying).

My only hope with you is that when you are an adult, you can say to people:  “Yea, growing up was pretty uneventful, I come from a normal, happy family.  I love my mom and dad.  They’re my best friends.”

You are a joy in my and your dad’s life.  We love you very much.

Happy nine month birthday 😀

Children vs. Career: Brazen Careerist

June 23, 2009

I just read a terrific post by the fabulous Penelope Trunk.  The reality is that life is not binary, it’s not absolute.  It’s messy and complex.  Life can not be boiled down to a mathematical equation [if this then this].

This is not an issue of whether abortion is right or wrong, it’s about the myth of having children being bad for a career.

I got two abortions to preserve my career. To keep my options open. To keep my aspirations within reach.

I bought into the idea that kids undermine your ability to build an amazing career.

And here I am, with the amazing career.

But also, here I am with two kids. So I know a bit about having kids and a career. And I want to tell you something: You don’t need to get an abortion to have a big career. Women who want big careers want them because something deep inside you drives you to change the world, lead a revolution, break new barriers.

It doesn’t matter whether you have kids now or later, because they will always make your career more difficult. There is no time in your life when you are so stable in your work that kids won’t create an earthquake underneath that confidence.

Taking care…

June 18, 2009

Did a reading for a favorite playwright.  Honestly, it was a bit of  a struggle.  It was 3.5 hours long and it was really hot on stage.  I got really tired and delirious toward the end.  It made me realize I need to get my ass in gear and take care of myself.  I’m going to be onstage doing my show in less than a month.  I now know that while I’m breastfeeding, my body is still not quite it’s old self.  I thought about hiring a chef to teach me how to cook healthy vegetarian food and I think I’m going to do it.  I have six performances and I can not afford to go crazy.  I need the sustenance.   

I haven’t been taking care of myself lately.  I’ve not been sleeping well, eating well, exercise…what’s exercise?  Yes I’m back to my normal weight but I definitely need to exercise.

The city makes me feel good…

June 12, 2009
This bag would be gone in .5 seconds in NYC

This bag would be gone in .5 seconds in NYC

Had an audition for a theatre production.  I did two pieces and the folks were really kind about it.  We’ll see if anything happens.

(It was a challenge to get there, I had my friend roll Baby M around in the carriage.  Also carry her up and down the subway stairs.  It was worth it.  I needed to see if I had the pieces in my head and they are there.)

FOUND: A babysitter!!!!  I’m so excited!!  I have great hopes for this girl.  She is temporary till she goes to law school in August.

Had coffee with a woman, D, I met at the opthomologist’s office.  She is so funny and  cracks me up so bad.  She has a baby the same age as Baby M AND SHE IS PREGNANT AGAIN.   When she told me that, my face expressed shock and she choked on her cookie laughing.

Positivity Galore

June 8, 2009

Baby M, chillin'

I’ve been complaining a lot so I’ve gone gangbusters and decided to run the other way to POSITIVITY LAND.  After falling and busting her eye, Baby M is now sick with a cold.  Today I’m focusing on relaxing while taking care of my little girl.  

I downloaded The Artist’s Way and Creative Visualization and already feel better.  We’ve been putting out fires left and right that sometimes it’s very easy to slide into negativity.  

This photo of Baby M makes me laugh so hard every time I look at it.  It sums up her current attitude.  She is feisty, funny and at the same time, a very good kid.  It puts me in a good mood.

Today is one of those few days that I’m glad I’m not working full time right (or even booked a commercial or film).  As Baby M coughs and hacks and sneezes with a running nose, I am grateful I can stay home and take care of her.  

So here’s to being positive.  (Raises a glass of soy milk)

Baby M is not feeling the swings…

June 2, 2009

Baby M

Baby J also not thrilled with a swing

Baby J also not thrilled with a swing