My inability to live with stillness…

Writing was a bit challenging today. I wrote for an hour, but I’m not sure where the character is going.

I decided I’m going to take a screenwriting class. I feel that being around other writers would be very helpful for me. In a few months (with the hopeful arrival of the little one…) I won’t be able to do as much writing as I can. I don’t want to fritter time away in my office by myself when I get stuck. I want to use this precious time I have to create fruitful work. Plus, the consistency will be good for me.

I met with my career coach today who steered me in the right direction in terms of perceiving what’s happening in my career. One week I’ll be auditioning for a network television show, the next I’m sitting around, depressed, on my couch wondering what to do with my life. I realized that without a full time job, the lulls of non-activity are really unsettling for me. Being able to focus solely on my acting career can be scary without the constant whir of motion…even if that motion is counterproductive. One of the major benefits of being pregnant (thank you, unborn child) is that I can only focus on one thing at a time. Physically I don’t have the energy.

After the feature and two shorts are wrapped up, I told my coach that in 2009 I wanted to put up a one-woman show. Surprisingly my coach was super psyched with that idea and, as it turns out, is an expert on one person shows. Winning various awards three years in a row at the New York Fringe Festival, teaching at Second City in Chicago and helping others launch their one-person shows nationally and internationally. I was a bit shy about the endeavor but now I’m quite excited about it.

Later in the day, I spoke with my best bud from high school who has THREE children. She was telling me inane jokes that she found through email. Usually I hate them but for some reason coming from her they struck me as funny. 

I find talking to my friends who have kids keeps me a bit sane. Especially in understanding how physically uncomfortable I can get sometimes. You can’t really explain it, it just is and they get it. Even if our loving husbands don’t.

Just got a call from a really cool casting director at ABC to be a reader for some auditions tomorrow. I love being there and seeing those guys. They are a compassionate group of people who care about actors.

March 30, 2008

For the past three days I’ve been having insomnia. I’m used to waking up at 2:00 AM, reading or surfing the web and then falling asleep around 4:30 AM. It’s unpleasant.

Today J and I went to Deborah, a yummy restaurant in the West Village. I had the granola and fruit and J ate the DELICIOUS pasta. We ordered fries and grits, we had to take it home because it was too much to eat. We walked around and J bought a Joy Division CD (so strange, haven’t done that in years).

Pregnant Brain

I’m taking into account how my hormones and brain sort of play tricks on me. Since I haven’t been working a 9-5 job, I find I might get a bit loopier than usual. In the morning I’m fine, but in the evening my brain starts to melt down and thoughts begin to swirl around into incomprehensibly. I have manic thoughts of cleaning the house, reading a book, re-writing and doing an internship at a film production company…all at the same time.

I spoke to my friend friend J who told me to calm down and focus on what I’m supposed to do. He’s a new dad and he was like: “Dude! You’re making a baby, just chill the freak out.” I realized I was a bit paranoid that I wasn’t “doing anything.” So I now know that whenever I get a little batty, I just chalk it up to being pregnant.

I also discovered my friend who is a writer/director discovered his girlfriend is 12 weeks pregnant. They’re in LA now but returning to New York so I’m hoping to see them since our kids might be the same age. Also, I don’t know pregnant people, so it’d be cool to get to know more future moms.

Yay a callback…

I got a callback for a commercial on Tuesday. It’s non-speaking so it’s definitely based on looks. It would be very sweet to get because it’s a 4 day shoot in LA and I would LOVE to go. Crossing fingers.

Good habits for successful writing…

So I’m on a slight roll and I don’t want to stop for lack of will, depression or laziness. Or because I can’t stop watching America’s Top Model re-runs.

I’ve come across a few websites that discuss good habits for successful writers. One specific question I had was how long should I write? This site suggests 1,500 words a day is sufficient. I thought that was more tangible way of looking at a daily goal.

This is a funny list of what countless famous writers did to get their words from pen to paper.

I liked how this list made sure a writer should add the element of enjoyment and fun to the mix.

20 pages…100 more to go!

I spoke to a buddy of mine out in LA who is writing a script. We talked about the writing process and how easy it is to get distracted from writing. (Distractions like talking about how hard it is to write or blogging…)

Syd Field’s book is great because it talks about common roadblocks that writers come across and how they begin to doubt themselves like crazy. Before I read this book, I had a reading of my screenplay and my script was simply awful. I had no concept of structure or plot or anything. It was a bunch of half baked ideas randomly thrown together. I felt that I definitely could never write a feature because I was not qualified. Field’s sentiment is that everyone goes through that feeling. And that’s usually when people have strong feelings of self doubt (check) and feel they must bring on a writing partner because they are stuck (double check).

His theory is that if you are stuck, don’t continue to plow through the writing without addressing the nagging feeling that something doesn’t work. Rather, examine what doesn’t flow and work with it. Go back and examine what the character wants, why they are there, how they feel, what happened in the past and explore the specific details.

I went to Starbucks, had a tall soy creamer and wrote for two hours straight. I have 20 pages so far, and it’s very exciting. Instead of frantic scenes thrown together, it flows and makes sense.

Also, other story lines and relationships that I hadn’t even thought of are really coming along nicely as well. For the first time in a long time I like what’s going on.

Woah, dreams CAN come true…

A few days ago I had written how I wanted to work with a few people like Sophia Coppola, Wes Anderson etc. It just so happens that I’ll be doing some readings of screenplays in a program headed by one of the people on my wish list! Israel Horovitz. Very exciting.

I went to the library to write at 10:00 today and wrote for an hour. It was a good writing session. This writing in the morning I plan to do on a consistent basis.

Afterwards I met up with B and got the footage of my short that I will finish once and for all. I thank my husband for yelling at me this morning to get my projects done.

NY1 & Chelsea Market

I visited my friend who works at NY1. She was so awesome to give me a thorough tour of her work site. We even walked into the area where the anchor was and my friend said: “Hello!” and then the anchor went right into her set.

We made plans to have dinner in April.

Some interesting facts:

-I hadn’t realized Chelsea market was the sacred site of where the Oreo cookie was created.

-The series “Oz” used to be shot there.

-Google is moving into the building and taking the flower shop in the Chelsea Market as their childcare center.

Afterwards, I moseyed downstairs to Ann’s bakery where I bought a baguette.

Tests are AOK

Got a call from my doc and she said the prenatal tests look good.  She said the results were that of a 20 year old and there was 1 in 9000 chances that there were high risk issues. 

That’s cool news, indeed 🙂

Are women innately catty?

I ran into two actresses who were former casts mates of a play I was in. One is pretty confident with herself, is beautiful and feisty and funny. The other one is also very cute and talented, but always acted a bit guarded towards me. While I was in the run of the show she was very friendly towards other people but always cool towards me. Smiling with daggers in her eyes.

I don’t believe that all women are insecure and catty. I believe it’s a myth. I’ve experienced situations where men who are just as catty and insecure. However, I do believe that the majority of women do believe that women are catty and perpetuate the myth. Plus some men like to make it a truth as well.

The shoot would be a few days in LA, I would LOVE for that to happen. I’m so over this cold weather.